Healing My Toxic Relationship With Candida
The silent physical and psychological effects of yeast overgrowth — and how to finally heal
Though harmless in a balanced gut, Candida can wreak havoc when given the opportunity, leading to intense sugar cravings, gut issues, chronic infections, and altered mood and energy | Photo by Lisa A on Shutterstock
For about half of my twenties, an infection raged in my body that wreaked constant havoc on my body and mind. Though I was diagnosed with Lyme disease, it took me many years to realize there was another organism blocking my gut and immune system from healing: Candida Albicans.
Though candida and fungal infections are getting more publicity, few people realize how pervasive or toxic they can be. Though candida is a harmless yeast in a balanced gut microbiome, it is insidious in one that’s been disturbed by poor diet, stress, or antibiotics.
Candida paves the way for other chronic infections, serious gut and endocrine damage, and even behavioral disorders and mental health problems. It is estimated that one in three people suffers from yeast overgrowth and Candida infection — usually without realizing it.
The situation is compounded when a fungal infection is mistaken for a bacterial one — such as when my doctor prescribed antibiotics for chronic UTI symptoms, which only returned stronger and stronger. Indeed, few people recognize the common signs of a candida overgrowth: fatigue, mood disorders, extreme sugar and carb cravings, recurring UTIs, sinus infections, bloating, and brain fog.
This is the story of my toxic relationship with candida, how it impacted my body and mind, and how I finally recognized and healed from it.
The Start of a Toxic Relationship
Shortly after I was diagnosed with Lyme disease at age 25, my doctor put me on an emergency dose of antibiotics. Warning me of the aggression of Lyme disease bacteria and the need to act quickly, he prescribed pulsed rounds of tetracycline and doxycycline. For two months, antibiotics pulsed through my body leaving me tired, bloated, and nauseous.
In the end, my doctor’s attempt to kill Lyme disease bacteria failed — but he did succeed in killing the population of my gut.
Though I parted ways with him shortly after, the effects lived on in my body. Despite taking probiotics, I remained tired, bloated, and foggy headed. Even worse, I didn’t feel like myself. I felt depressed and as if someone had dropped a paperweight on my brain, stopping my mind and feelings from soaring. Though my friends gave me grace for my strange moods — since I was struggling with arthritis, unemployed, and unable to play music — I knew the problems weren’t only in my outer life. Something was deeply wrong in my inner life.
Luckily, a nutritionist I met six months after my diagnosis helped me identify food sensitivities and adopt a diet — no processed sugar, alcohol, fried foods, dairy, or soy — that gave me enough energy to move to California and start fresh. Though my health was up and down, I generally felt good until my last few months in the city.
Shortly before heading abroad, I took a short-term rental in a new apartment and within my first days of staying there, my energy levels tanked. I suddenly felt constantly sick, foggy-headed, and depressed. By the time I made it to Germany, I was struggling with over a dozen new food sensitivities, arthritis, and severe mood swings. Then, my doctor gave me a test result that helped me finally understand what was going on in my body.
Putting the Pieces Together
As he handed me back a mycotoxin test, he explained that my body was struggling with an “Aspergillus” mold infection acquired in my last apartment but that based on my health history, he was quite certain my body had been struggling with a long-term candida infection that made my immune system susceptible to further damage. To test his theory, he put me on a 6-month anti-fungal protocol and recommended an alkaline diet and practice water fasting to fully heal.
During this time, I also discovered the work of Donna Gates, who describes how to heal chronic fungal infections in her book “Body Ecology Diet:”
To reverse this overgrowth of candida, we must restore an inner environment that prevents candida from taking over. This requires two major actions: killing off the bad yeast and other opportunistic parasitic organisms by creating mineral-rich slightly alkaline blood, and then recolonizing the friendly bacteria and restoring proper digestion. Both are essential to reestablishing your immune system.
From the “Body Ecology Diet,” I learned a few major principles that improved my symptoms:
80/20 Rule: Only eat until you are 80% full, leaving 20% room for digestion.
Food Combination: Avoid food pairings that support poor digestion and fermentation in the gut.
Alkaline/Acid Balance: Aim to maintain a mineral-rich, alkaline diet that makes the gut a poor environment for yeast.
Digestive Support: If you struggle with digestion, take digestive enzymes before meals. From personal experience, taking Betaine HCl with meals can also help with the issue of low stomach acid.
While the alkaline diet recommended by “Body Ecology Diet” improved my digestion, water fasting created an immediate breakthrough for me.
Within a couple days, I noticed dramatic changes: my bloating went away, my mind sharpened, and the white coating that had been on my tongue for years vanished and my tongue was once again clear and pink.
Emotionally, I felt like the sun had come out. The paperweight that had been sitting on my brain was lifted and the buoyancy returned to my personality. I no longer had to lift myself up everyday — I was happy and balanced. After five years, I finally felt like the person I had always believed I was but had lost confidence existed.
One Step Back, Two Steps Forward
The connection between the fungal infection and my mental health became even clearer when I went to my friend’s wedding around the time I finished the anti-fungal protocol. For the first time in months, I let myself eat cake and chocolate to celebrate. I ate fresh German bread and fruit and for a few days let go of my discipline to celebrate for a few days.
And shortly after my return from the wedding, the fog returned. Riding my bike on a beautiful day, I couldn’t feel any happiness or very much of anything. I ran my hand over my skin and noticed it felt dry and scaly. I even looked in the mirror and saw a thin white film on my tongue. But this time I knew what was going on in my body.
This time I observed my emotions and realized that they weren’t “me.” There was something in me that was growing in my gut, blocking the production of serotonin, dampening my immune system, and releasing toxins into my brain that left it inflamed and unable to concentrate.
And this time, I knew how to starve it. I went inside and mixed a tablespoon of apple cider vinegar with a large glass of water and began a water fast the next morning. Within a day, my happiness and energy returned and after a few more days of a fasting reset, my body came back into balance.
Reflections on Candida
Like any true toxic relationship, Candida brings out the worst in me. But now that I know it so well, I recognize the symptoms in my body and mind: the dry skin, bloating, brain fog, depression and lack of connection to life. On the occasion it comes back, I know how to starve it and return to balance.
Now when I look at my five years of struggling with candida, I take it as a lesson. It’s taught me firsthand how deeply linked the mind and body are — especially the brain and the gut — and how taking care of the gut is a daily mental health practice. It’s also shown me that no matter what state an infection puts me in, I am not the infection — I have the capacity to stand above it, observe it, and consider it a message to bring my body back into balance.
